If I recovered next week I would garden from morning ‘til night. As things are now, I settle for thinking about gardening from morning ‘til night. It’s a lovely thing.
I’ve been flicking through a couple of Edna Walling books and wondering if I’ve found one of my garden soul-mates. She loved erigeron (seaside daisy) - until now I had never come across a garden writer, or anyone at all for that matter, who loves erigeron like I do. Edna also loved birch trees, dry stone walls, and bossing people around. Say no more.
I germinated some erigeron and my husband planted them out. The seedlings are doing splendidly and flowering with gusto. I show them to visitors, but perplexingly, there have been no cartwheels in honour of their brilliance.
When I was a whipper-snapper I thought gardening was boring, although I loved my grandmothers’ gardens.
Granny (maternal side) and Papa’s garden is a cottage garden in the true sense - a mixture of productive and ornamental plants. It tells the story of their life together; it emanates simplicity, charm, and grace. There’s a small vineyard in one corner, a nod to Papa’s profession. They are instinctive and knowledgeable plants-people, if I grow up with a skerrick of their combined knowledge I’ll be thrilled. Their garden is my favourite place in the world. When I travel in my mind to my happy place, that’s where I go.
Nana (paternal side) and Grandpa’s garden was more formal. Beautiful mass-planted roses by the house, agapanthus along the drive. A whacking great bunya pine. I never saw either of them gardening, Nana worked full-time and Grandpa wasn’t well so I think they had a man who came to help, but Nana adored the garden. I remember helping her water the roses, she was always reminding me to give them a nice long drink. I also remember splashing in the bird bath as a baby, no matter the people who say you can’t remember things that far back.
In my early 20s I travelled from Queensland to Adelaide to convalesce at Granny and Papa’s, and spent many hours on the cane lounge gazing out the window at the hollyhocks, quince tree, lavender, and all the other wonders. On my return home, my mother gave me some herbs to grow in pots on the verandah. I toppled into garden love. As love so often does, it took me by surprise. I was much stronger than I am now and could garden a little bit, though no heavy work. I used to read the same Digger’s catalogue for three hours at a time. My passion continued fully-fledged until I had the Great Relapse of 2004 which coincided with an apartment-living lifestyle and the prison of bed. Along with any activity not related to basic survival, my garden involvement shrivelled up. In 2005 I started this blog, a little garden of words, instead.
Now I’m a born-again gardenista, working on finding ways to participate in a garden of dirt and leaves and weeds. My body is still recalcitrant, very much so; but I can interact with the plants through close attention, patient observation, and great appreciation. Gardening with my eyes is a rewarding approach to plant nurturing. I’m the garden sentinel, or maybe the garden is mine. There is something so perfectly hopeful about a growing plant. Each bud that emerges is a victory, an unspeakable beauty, a bold solace, a declaration of the natural rhythm of growth and expansion. The plants are generous enough to share all that with me. I thank them.
Seeking a robot to be my arms and legs. Like Inspector Gadget, except you obviously have your own robot body separate from mine, so not really like Inspector Gadget at all. Must be competent and cooperative. Willing and able to work in garden, cook, type, sew cushion covers, turn pages of books, keep secrets, make beds, wield a hairdryer, memorise telly guide, brew tea, etc. Tap dancing skills a bonus. Cute robotic squeaks acceptable, but no disputes relating to why something should be done differently to how I want it done. If you accept the position I am the benign domestic dictator and you my robot underling. We will start with making pesto. We can share the pesto.
This year I’m not being silly about it. Last year I had extreme post-festive payback. As March rolled around and I emerged from the dungeon of very low functionality, I concluded It Wasn’t Worth It. This year I’m setting boundaries, mostly with myself. I’m generally the culprit who needs reigning in. I’m in a prolonged crash anyway so it’s not too hard.
No writing of cards, no presents – the functional time involved in selecting, online shopping and wrapping is just too much. No meals with hordes of people. People are more than welcome at our place, but they have to bring the tucker.
Yes to a decorated tree, eating far too much, and our annual tradition of a short evening drive to see the lights on people’s houses. By evening the stinking heat of the day has subsided a little, and you gotta get out sometimes. You gotta get out so you can try to figure out who or what 'Shelby' is (the family dog?), and be impressed that the same household loves Holden so very much.
I just love unabashed enthusiasm. There’s something about the effort people go to in putting up all these lights that’s absolutely heart-warming.
There’s one house that’s my favourite. I tried to take a photo but it turns out it’s quite hard to photograph lights, especially from a moving car. In many ways the display is more unassuming than others, but they have strings of white fairy lights draped on some kind of frame over their whole yard, creating a magical twinkling ceiling. The owners always stand out the front, and if you drive past slowly, the man calls out, “You’re welcome to come in and have a look!”
For obvious reasons I’ve never gotten out to have a look. But every year I call out the car window, “Yours is my favourite!”
Many of you will already know this, but for those that don’t, in October there was a tremendous hullabaloo in the ME/CFS world, and there still is. The best kind of hullabaloo.
The WPI studies neuro-immune disease, has reputable researchers on board, and has achieved amazing things in a short time. Their study found a potential link between ME/CFS and a retrovirus called XMRV. As the Director of Research for the WPI, Dr Judy Mikovits said in the press release:
“We now have evidence that a retrovirus named XMRV is frequently present in the blood of patients with CFS. This discovery could be a major step in the discovery of vital treatment options for millions of patients."
Although it’s not yet clear if it’s an issue of causation or correlation (an important differentiation), many of the well-regarded names in the ME/CFS world are making big calls about the importance of the discovery. I’ve never, ever seen a response like this, and that in itself is exciting. It’s also garnered plenty of attention in the mainstream media.
Hillary Johnson has also written about it in her inimitable style in an excellent article, ‘A Case of Chronic Denial’ in the New York Times. She is also reporting on XMRV on her fabulous blog.
If you’re interested in further reading, there are many links in my shared google reader items tagged with XMRV. Scroll through and see what catches your eye, or subscribe to the XMRV feed. There is an overwhelming amount of discussion out there. I’ve kept to the basics in this post, but I’ll be adding fresh links from the spectrum of opinion to that list of shared items as I come across them. All the shared items automatically pop up in the sidebar on the right.
“But most of all I want to predict where this is going. I am using the "force" here. I have no special or inside information from the Whittemore-Peterson Institute. They have to be cautious and circumspect. I don't. I am an old man sitting on my porch rocking chair, desperately trying to retire; I will say what I think is true.
“…the really good news is that if XMRV is the puppet-master of ME/CFS, it conceivably could be very treatable. Theoretically, more treatable than HIV. Lots of work to do.
The politics of ME/CFS are daunting. But now may be the time to forge ahead and get something done. Congratulations again to the authors and the Whittemores. It is time for the CDC and the NIH to be constructive and do some science.
“…I think XMRV is going to turn out to be the "cause" of ME/CFS, and I think treatments will be available from every family physician in America who accepts Medicare. The question is whether this occurs next year or twenty years from now.”
“It’s important not to take these new findings about the XMRV virus as anything more than an exciting new development. We need confirmatory studies, then studies to see if the virus is contributing to the cause of illness persistence and symptoms. The good news is that if XMRV is linked to CFS, there are many antiviral drugs that have already been safety tested in HIV. that may inhibit viral replication. So those studies could be designed very rapidly.”
“My HIV patients for the most part are hale and hearty thanks to three decades of intense and excellent research and billions of dollars invested. Many of my CFS patients, on the other hand, are terribly ill and unable to work or participate in the care of their families.
I split my clinical time between the two illnesses, and I can tell you if I had to choose between the two illnesses (in 2009) I would rather have HIV. But CFS, which impacts a million people in the United States alone, has had a small fraction of the research dollars directed towards it.”
Patients with ME/CFS (XAND) deal with a myriad of health issues as their quality of life declines. I’m excited about the possibility of providing patients who are positive for XMRV a definitive diagnosis, and hopefully very soon, a range of effective treatment options.
“X Associated Neuro-immune Disease, or XAND - a new disease entity encompassing ME/CFS - will require additional research funding to find effective treatments.”
“The finding of antibody or active virus in 95% of CFS and 4% of controls is a result that argues for causality, in my opinion, especially with the associated RNAse-L corruption and NK functional impairment that might predict such an infection. This novel retrovirus could easily shift the redox state just like HIV as has been published in (2001) and (1995) and induce all manner of associated pathogens as seen in CFS. A redox shift could ultimately corrupt the gut ecology and create P450 decoupling based on NADPH depletion observed in CFS and lead to environmental illness as well. Time will tell but I think Dr. Mikovits is right to suspect causality.”
“Dr Peterson, probably one of the nicest and learned colleagues in the field of CFS, recently from the brand new, just opened, multi-million dollar Whittemore Peterson Institute in Reno Nevada, announced overwhelming evidence that the cause of M.E. or CFS, is XMRV retrovirus. The XMRV mouse retrovirus occurred in 68% of the CFS patient’s blood samples and only 4% of non-CFS patients. Pretty convincing!
This retrovirus theory comes with a history: It was first raised as a possibility by the gay community at a symposium I attended in San Francisco in 1987 and again by Florida based researcher Dr DeFreitas in the early 1990s. Dr DeFreitas discussed this retrovirus theory in our textbook, ‘The Clinical and Scientific Basis of ME/CFS’.
At the very least, this retrovirus discovery is great free advertising for the Whittemore Peterson Institute. It will possibly bring them in many millions of dollars from, patients willing to be separated from their assets, generous charities and governments before the retrovirus theory is once again thrown into the garbage bin. I should add that incubation period of XMRV is up to 21 days which makes it impossible to cause an epidemic illness. One theory to explain this “new” finding is that XMRV is a mouse virus and since many research institutes have tens of thousands of mice, cross contamination of specimens are inevitable.”
And now for some video interviews. Here's parts 1 and 2 of an interview with Judy Mikovits and Annette Whittemore. I just love how genuinely thrilled the interviewer is.
And Dr Nancy Klimas:
There’s much I’d like to say on this, and I will, but I’ll leave it there for now.
We’re moving, due to the highly thrilling fact we’ve bought a house. Which means an amazing thing: a garden. I loved gardening long before it was socially acceptable, even somewhat trendy, for younger people to appreciate the art. These days Jamie Durie and his ilk are on the telly, extolling the many virtues. But back in the olden days, when I was at a party one evening, a guy looked at me askance and said: I hear you’re a bit of a Don Burke, eh? And then I told him about my sweet corn.
I may have already been purchasing seeds on the internet and obsessively perusing mail-order catalogues. I told you it was going to be a good year, and when I said that, I didn’t know a house and garden were in the offing. Housing has become ridiculously expensive in Australia (second only to Spain and Ireland, according to this article my friend told me about), and with one income and hefty health bills, we’d long accepted that we’d be tenants until further notice. Then there was a global financial crisis, interest rates went down, and we went oh yes, and thought we’d give it a go. It was one of those ‘now or never’ scenarios. It has been one of my dearest wishes to one day have our own place, I can scarcely believe it’s true.
I’ve designated myself boss-lady in charge of seed raising. Brace yourself for lots of seedling reports, after I recover from the transplant shock.
Hope is the thing with feathers That perches in the soul. And sings the tune Without the words, And never stops at all. -Emily Dickinson
I live in bed and plant flowers under my pillow. They bloom round my head and I pick them for visitors. I'm not tired. Would you like a peony, a song or a feather?
"Start by doing 1 minute of exercise & add an extra minute each day." "Push through it." "Sweep the floor - at least it'd be a project." "The blood-type diet fixed my uncle." "Baptism." "Perhaps if you set some goals?" "You should drink epsom salts in water." "Part-time university." "Have you heard the idea about jumping on an electric fence?" "My cousin took extra B vitamins and now she's better." "You can manifest good health. Your mind creates your reality: what you think about, you bring about." "Ice baths." "Get some hobbies, if you take your mind off things you never know what might happen." "Goji berries." "I know a great naturopath." "Maybe if you just tried harder?" "There's nothing stopping you from being well except you." "Have you explored Christianity? The Lord cured my headaches."
